One of the hardest things to do in life is to move forward when there is no closure to the past. It is like a book that is missing the last few pages. No explanation. No reason. No answers. Just an abrupt end before the story was over. In my heart of hearts, I know… Continue reading If I could say one last thing…
I Found The Words.
Are you tired of hearing from me this week? I have had a lot to work through and I am thankful you have been hear to get me through it. I prayed for the words to tell the small boy he would not be seeing Mr. X and his kids anymore. And my prayers were… Continue reading I Found The Words.
I give myself 12 Days.
Today, I should have been snuggled on the couch watching football with my love, enjoying the last moments of my holiday break. Today, I should have been laughing and talking about what the new year had in store for us. Today, I should have been making plans for our kids next weekend. Today, I should… Continue reading I give myself 12 Days.
The ladder worked.
It’s hard to dance when you are standing on a wall. I tiptoed up there for quite a while. I have to be honest, that wall blocked the warmth of the sun. Years of trust issues and hurt made my world a dark place. When I finally got the courage to climb that wall, it… Continue reading The ladder worked.
I am the girl on the wall.
Forward motion is hard when you are tied to your pasts. It is always there. There are always reminders. There are regrets and resentments and victories and celebration. But, it is always a part of you. The past molded and shaped who I am. It also built walls. Tall, treacherous, sturdy walls. It built a… Continue reading I am the girl on the wall.
Intuition or anxiety?
Did you ever meet someone that seems so perfect? And then, they are not? They make you question yourself and your own judgement of others? When their words don't match their actions and you listen to the action, when all along you should have been listening to the words? I had sirens ringing in my… Continue reading Intuition or anxiety?
I have spent a lot of my life with a quick temper. I am a little more frustration than most. I dwell on things. I worry and then I lash out. At friends, at family, at my sweet kiddo. For the longest time, I have had a bad temper but as I dove into some… Continue reading Anxious much?
What are you looking for?
Such a strange questions. What are you looking for? It seems to be a common question that I get ask when on a date and getting to know someone. How do you answer that? I am not sure I can. I think I am a person that will know it, when I find it? There… Continue reading What are you looking for?
I’m Still Here.
I sit here, alone, at my kitchen table staring at the old stuffed sheep that the small boy carries from room to room. It is the last day of 2019. This year is ending so differently than I had expected. On this day last year, I was planning trips for my family. I was gearing… Continue reading I’m Still Here.
All the baggage.
When you are 45 and single, you quickly realize that at this point in life, anyone that is single comes with baggage. We are all little damaged. We have all been through some muck. The other thing I am realizing is that it was no ones fault. At least, not most of the men that… Continue reading All the baggage.