Emotional processing

I am just a women.

I am just a woman, a mother, trying to make it through this moment. Sometimes, everything is just too much and the crying just starts out of nowhere. No warning. It is a lot for one woman to hold. We hold our children, hold down our careers, hold down the fort, hold our heads high… Continue reading I am just a women.

Emotional processing

The Quiet in the Busy.

I have been busy, busy, busy. I'd like to say I to want to slow down but it is so, very, very hard. For the last 10 years, my house has been filled with the noise of family. My husband, my in-laws, the small boy. Noise and chaos and laughter and then...silence. When the small… Continue reading The Quiet in the Busy.

Emotional processing, Uncategorized

Busy, busy, busy…

Life has been so busy that I have not had the time to sit down and formulate my thoughts. I am realizing without putting them down they are whirling in my brain like a tornado. Spinning. Crashing. And being thrown at innocent victims. Stress is high and I am working to get it under control.… Continue reading Busy, busy, busy…

color street, Emotional processing, Marriage Struggles

I have much more important things…

When faced with adversity and the lack of a good answer, a very common response is "I have much, more important things to do." As if your question is not important. In reality, that response usually comes from one of three things, the need to feel better about one's self, the need to feel important… Continue reading I have much more important things…

Emotional processing, Marriage Struggles

Some days I want to scream.

Please, indulge me as I rant! Today, I want to scream profanities at the top of my lungs. I am annoyed, angry and disgusted. Things get under my skin and I can't get them out. I have a tendency to obsess on little stuff. Today is one of those days. I have no tolerance for… Continue reading Some days I want to scream.

color street, Emotional processing

When you see the shine.

When you put in the hard work, you reap the rewards. A day spent cleaning rewards me with a shiny home. An afternoon spent washing the Jeep rewards me with a shiny jeep. A few months searching your soul rewards you with a shiny you. It takes work, reflection, support and tears but when you… Continue reading When you see the shine.

Emotional processing, Marriage Struggles

Happy Anniv….oh wait.

Today is a day that I have not look forward to since my separation a month and a half ago. It's my wedding anniversary, but not just any anniversary. The 10 year one. A decade. We made it almost a decade, but we didn't. I couldn't, so I didn't. Today is not a celebration. Today… Continue reading Happy Anniv….oh wait.

color street, Emotional processing, Marriage Struggles

One Month In.

It has been just over a month since my husband moved out and we started sharing custody of our little guy. What a month it has been. I have had some of the best times of my life and some of the hardest moments. The adjustment to this new life is different. It's hard to… Continue reading One Month In.

color street, Emotional processing

Today is better.

After my separation sucks pity party, I put my big girl panties on and started down the trail to find my sparkle, again. I spent the the last few days enjoying my family while they were here from Pennsylvania. I recharged my batteries. My sparkle, it was never really gone, I just lost it for… Continue reading Today is better.

Emotional processing

How did I get here?

I have spent a lot of time pondering my new status in life. Separated. How did I get here? What do I do now that I am here? It is such a weird transitional place to be. You are married but you live your lives separately. You have separate homes. Separate finances. Separate schedules. And… Continue reading How did I get here?